In this post, I write about the connection between hating your body and emotional eating.
Many people go through life body shaming themselves because they are a few pounds or several pounds heavier than they would like to be or they are not where they were ten years ago.
Of course, hearing their own voice saying negative things about themselves in their head many times a day will make them feel miserable and they might even feel like a failure. A common way people deal with difficult emotions and negative self-image is ironically: (binge) eating. Eating is an inexpensive, quick, easy, and reliable way to temporarily take away the pain and hurt of how we feel.
It´s not your fault if you have a negative body image and you emotionally eat
It´s not your fault if you emotionally eat to deal with the pain of having a negative body image. It´s also not your fault if you have a negative body image.
Our bodies are designed to crave sugar, salt, and fat
Our bodies are designed to crave sugar, salt, and fat because they were scarce when we evolved many years ago. So, now, the craving is still there, even though these ingredients are easily available.
Breast milk is also high in sugar and fat
Breast milk is also high in sugar and fat, so our brain associates the feelings of being loved and cared for with these flavors.
We have been conditioned to respond to discomfort with food
Many of us have been conditioned from infancy to respond to discomfort or feelings of pain through food. When babies cry, they get sweet, fatty milk, and they are happy again. When a child falls and scrapes their knee, their mom gives them ice cream or a lollipop to comfort them. We visit our grandmother or mother as adults and they make our favorite foods for us.
These are just a couple of reasons why, from an early age, people have learned that when you are feeling down or sad, food can make you feel better. This leads some adult brains to become cross-wired, and we eat in response to any discomfort that we may be feeling. Food becomes the soother of all emotional and physical pain and is also a perfect distraction from body shaming.
The food industry makes more profit from processed food
To add insult to injury, the food industry makes more profit from processed food than it does from healthy, unprocessed food. Hence, they constantly bombard us with images of the things they want us to buy. They make these ads emotionally triggering on purpose. These ads send us the message that these foods and sugary drinks will make us happy, confident, and loved. They associate these foods with having fun with friends and family. These are very powerful marketing tactics.
The diet industry´s role
Social media, celebrity magazines, and some TV programs, led by the diet industry, tend to talk about weight and food issues in moral terms: “I´ve been good today, I didn’t eat the muffin at work.” But if someone feels guilty and ashamed when they eat something they enjoy and deny themselves all their favorite foods, they will obviously feel bad. What does someone who tends to emotionally eat do, when they feel bad? They eat, of course.
Society bombards people with images and comparisons that promote a negative body image if they don’t meet those standards. Advertising is designed to make you believe that you need their products to look good. But what you need is self-compassion.
Self-compassion breaks the vicious cycle
Self-compassion can break you out of the cycle of body shaming leading to emotional eating. We have been taught to be hard on ourselves to achieve our goals. We tell ourselves that deprivation and self-criticism is the only way to get to the desired body image. But it isn´t. Self-criticism only fuels the vicious cycle of overeating and negative body image.
When you operate from a place of love and compassion, you will treat yourself well. You will look after your body and will not go on that stringent diet that promises you to lose 14 pounds in two weeks (overly strict diets always lead to overeating).
The key is to give your body the nourishment that it needs but don´t overdo it. It is ok to say no to yourself and not eat when you are not hungry. But you will feel better about the pounds that you have lost being kind to yourself rather than depriving yourself and reverting to old habits when you do not see the results you expected or were advertised.
Self-kindness instead of self-criticism
Treat yourself like you would treat someone you love. Chances are, you would never try to body shame someone you love (a friend or family member), so why do it to yourself? Love yourself for who you are and not what you look like. Work toward bettering yourself for the right reasons and not just because you want to look like the models in a magazine.
You are not alone
Everyone feels negative about their bodies at one point or another, whether they want to admit it. If you think you are the only one hating your body sometimes, and no one could understand what you are feeling, think again! This is just part of being human.
According to the American Psychological Association…
● 9 out of 10 women in the US are unhappy with their appearance
● 81% of 10-year-old girls experience a fear of being fat
● Adolescent girls are more afraid of gaining weight than getting cancer, losing their
parents, or nuclear war
● 2 out of 5 women would give up 3-5 years of their life in exchange for weight loss
● 97% of women confess they have at least one “I hate my body moment” each day
Shocking statistics, right?
Everyone has something that they do not like about themselves, but you should never isolate yourself. It will only lead to more issues and more binge eating to make you feel better temporarily.
Self-awareness and mindfulness
Be aware of when you are body shaming yourself and start hating on your body and want to use food to get you out of the emotional rut. Work yourself away from the binge eating of sugary, fried, or greasy foods, and mindfully eat healthier food choices, more vegetables, and fruits. Eating mindfully will promote healthy eating and good health. It will even help you lose weight without even noticing you are doing so.
In my workbook I lead you through the process of becoming aware of your triggers and reasons for emotional eating, learning to notice when they present themselves in your everyday life, and being able to stop eating when you are not hungry. It also shows you how to eat mindfully when you are hungry. It helps you develop short- and long-term strategies to deal with triggering situations in the future. It also has a chapter about how to learn to love yourself and take better care of yourself so you don´t use food as “me-time” or your main source of pleasure. You can learn more about the workbook here.
This free training will show you the exact steps to stop feeling out of control around food and eliminate emotional eating, stress eating, and binge eating.
You can love yourself as you are and still want to change
No matter what the numbers on the scale show, you are beautiful in every way. Numbers on the scale or the number on the pair of jeans you are wearing do not make you less attractive and worthless. They are not a reason to start hating your body.
Yes, there could be things that you would want to work on to make yourself healthier and feel better; however, you are still beautiful no matter what. You can love yourself as you are and still want to change, that´s ok. You love your children but you still want them to pick their toys up. You may love your job and still want to have a higher salary.
If you love yourself, you want the best for your body. You eat healthily and exercise to feel good and to have a healthy and long life instead of losing weight. As a side effect, you will also lose weight. Isn´t it better if you feel good during the process?
When you are comfortable with yourself in your skin (even if you do not look like a poster girl), those around you will see you for who you are and not the flaws you think you have.
This podcast episode discusses the connection between hating your body and emotional eating
We also talked about the connection between hating your body and emotional eating with Nikki Leigh on her Ready for Love radio show.
You can listen to the replay below:
http://www.lovecoachjourney.com/emotionaleating/
http://www.podcastgarden.com/episode/emotional-eating-and-body-image_161346
Topics and Questions We Discussed
- Why it isn’t your fault if you struggle with emotional eating and negative body image.
- How the obsession with dieting causes negative body image and self-hatred
- Will you be happier and love your body more at a smaller size (after losing weight)?
- Habits to promote positive body image.
- How do the words you use and your thoughts affect you and how to choose them to help you.
- The sign and symptoms of emotional eating.
- The causes and triggers of emotional eating.
- How the all-or-nothing mentality makes you overeat?
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